eBay find of the day: Yea Boi! The Best Chevy ever-made gets Better!

We're big fans of the 80s Chevrolet Caprice - the Brick. The Caprice was big and it was fast. There was really nothing else to it. And if you're going to have a cheap car, have yourself a big one.

If you got the police package, you had yourself a Camero that cooled better and sat five. Plus spotlights!

Still, this eBayer found a way to improve on a perfect car. Not just by adding 26' Cabo rims but also making a custom suspension for them, monster truck-style.

The obligatory Lambo doors and lots of subwoofers are here too and this phat ass whip was also featured in East Coast Ryders: Volume 3 which we all know was the Godfather 2 of the ECR franchise.



The seller now 'needs money for a situation that's come up' and Buy It Now is only 15 grand!

This will be the Dusenberg of our time.

Pickup Spot: Expensive gas, now James Inhofe and Korea - are Trucks screwed?

First, a bit of poli-sci background. James Inhofe was, until just after the mid-terms, chairman of the Senate Committee on Environment and Public Works. Because he doesn't beleive in global warming, American drivers have cheerfully been left alone when it came to cutting down on ice cap-melting V8s. And that was pretty good...for us, not the ice caps. Screw those.

Now, James, who compared Al Gore's whale hugging, tree kissing, flick to Hitler's Mein Kompf, is gone. And a democrat is taking his place. Good for the environment, bad for big, fat, fun trucks. Are trucks in trouble? Will we still be able to highlight the quality with which we f*ck using the immense size of our truck? We'll see.

In the meantime, here's the latest in truckdom:

We've been looking forward to the H3T - based on the concept GM showed off like three years ago, before the H3 was even out (left). Now, it looks like we're getting closer to production. And the pictures just posted on AutoBlog (below) made our mouths fill with vomit, as dreams of our new Hummer H3T pickup fizzled away. Might as well just get a Ranger.



Jeep, meanwhile, also gave up its concept truck ambitions and settled for a bit of welding to chop down the Wrangler into a Wrangler with a pickup bed. Again, the concept - cool. The actual truck we'll be seeing soon? Well, you have to really like the front end of Wranglers (as I do) to give a crap. We've got high hopes for the extended cab. There's no room for stuff behind the seats in this one Plus, let's home a real-Jeep-style soft top is coming too. The convertible Dakotas are getting pretty old, we need a convertible truck! (SSR is not a truck)

Finally, check out what the Koreans are threatening us with now. No, it's not a brilliant white light being the last thing we all see before being vaporised. That's a different Korea. South Korea just plan to nuke America's truck industry. As opposed to Jeep and Hummer, this is the real demilitirized zone right here:

Instead of playing soldier, the concept sketches from Kia and Hyundai look like Titan-style pickups where you sit on leather watching big screens not playing G.I.Joe in a truck based on another truck based on a civilian version of an army truck.

Yeah, We're Half Way There.

My man, Bob, at Cars Cars Cars says the Volvo C30 won't be out until 2008 or 9. I say, that's crap. Why would you still care in two years? When Mini wanted to make a longer Mini, for no reason at all, they just did it. And yet, shopping the ass-end of a S40 takes 3 years? By then, Focuses will fly, Scions will turn into robots and Minis will come with about twelve doors, including four as the rear hatch.

All I'm saying is, if you have a cool car, just make it already. This is the only Volvo that doesn't look lame, almost ever (I do like the 544 from the 60s). And, come to think of it, that's a cool Volvo hatchback that's already out. With less than 100 horsepower but tons of coolness, you won't beat the 544 - and, for around 5 grand, you're probably better off. The C30 looks good in the pictures, but in real life it's as pretentious and vaguely effeminate as any Volvo.

basic transportation Celebrates new logo with customized, International® CXT GigantoTruck.

Well, we wish. There are trucks and then, there's the real thing - with a air horn, the kind with a string to pull, and big pipes coming out the top. There's a bunch of good reasons to study hard in school, and affording a real truck is probably the best. Go to http://www.internationaldelivers.com/mycxt to design your very own International CXT and stay in school.

Going down Towncar.

The Best and Biggest Back Seat in America says its farewell.

Perhaps a lame title - but the demise of the universally beloved Lincoln Towncar is a tragedy of 96' Chevrolet Impala SS proportions. The Towncar badge has been an icon, on and off, since 1959. It was the ultimate in American luxury, chauffeuring gangsters and politicians alike - sometimes at the same time. It's vinyl top kept you cool in the summer and warm in the winter.

Though it was always powerful and big - that's not what made this Lincoln such a charmer. It was simply the most comfortably caron the road (that's right, Caddy, I said it) . Before Escalades, Navigators, Excursions and even S-Classes came into our lives - there wasn't a cushier, more luxurious car to get out the back of.

A squishy suspension and supermodel amounts of leg-room guaranteed that you weren't going to smack any part of you on any part of the Towncar. Driving it too was a treat - though not necessarily for car service drivers, who racked up hundreds of thousands of miles.

The death of yet another, rear-wheel-drive, eight cylinder car (Lincoln's last RWR since the end of the LS) brings us that one step closer to the end of the American car industry. It's hard to see the point of the Lincoln brand, considering it now makes nothing but disguised Fords and the ridiculous and way-politically-incorrect Navigator.

The big, and still classic, Towncar will be missed. Let's celebrate how quiet it rode with a moment of silence.
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Good night sweet Towncar. And Flights of Angels Sing Thee to Thy Rest....

Fat girls try harder. So do GM and Ford.

We all know it's true. Fat girls try harder. They have to. What obesity can do for a girl is what bankruptcy does for Ford and GM. Desperation. GM just announced a hefty, Hyundai-like, 100,000 mile warranty. Awesome. Meanwhile, Ford is rocking your fragile world with 72 - count 'em - 72 months of 0% financing. You can make tiny payments on that Ranger forever.

Mmmmm. So tempting. Like any ridiculously fat girls, GM and Ford's offers are almost impossible to resist. The Mustang, a nice, hefty Silverado - it all sounds so good. But what's next? Like any truly fat girl discovers, incentives get old and, inevitably, they'll catch you staring at an Infinity or Honda - the girls that don't have to try to get your lovin.

Check out what the guy who runs Porsche has to say about the incentives that low-self-esteemed US carmakers throw at buyers. Porsche have sold a car or two - and you'll never catch them looking in the mirror and sucking in their gut with employee discounts, low financing or a good warranty. They get you because you want a Porsche - possibly because you only got fat girls in high school.

Jaguar, meanwhile, only wish they were 'gorgeous' - offering as much as eight grand off cars to get their fat asses off the lot.

The sad thing is - like eating disorders - GM and Ford aren't losers because their cars suck. That's only a part of the problem. Pensions, unions and, as the Porsche guy points out, just way too much extra stock sitting around - getting dusty - and old - like fat girls - like fat girls that don't do dirty things.

So, Ford and GM, stop whoring yourself out and start respecting yourself enough to hold back production until the right buyer comes along.

Or just throw up after you eat.

Caught in the Crossfire...'s lameness.

Remember the Crossfire?

Yeah, no one does. And yet, if the desperate housewife on your street didn't go for its mid-life crisis tackling appeal - maybe this thing will do the trick.

Maybe this is the dad version. After slamming doors and screaming about his wife doesn't really understand him - he can storm out and get into this, Hemi-powered, 1.5 ton Viagra bottle . Cause that's what this is. It's even called the Firepower - to remind you that you don't shoot blanks. The idea of this sort of sporty Chrysler actually makes the Corvette seem like it's for young people. Check out the story on Car's awesome new website - fun fact: Car's been a hair away from publishing my Escalade test-drive for 4 months. I'll let you know how that goes.

Hybrids pay for themselves? Why don't they...buy me one, by themselves then.

A think piece.

My main man Bobby S picks up on the CNN story about Hybrids paying for themselves. Sure, it might take six years - and, by that point, gas will be so expensive that hybrids will pay for themselves even faster. This is making my head hurt. However, a fun note is that an unidentified source at Galpin Ford - the kick-assingest Ford dealership in California - actually pointed out to me that...big finish...The Hybrid Escape gets worse gas mileage than the terrorist loving, baby seal clubbing, wood-burning, none-hybrid model.

But Basic Transportation, how the hell can that be? Because of added weight and the fact that - I'll say it again - hybrids only run on electricity at or below around 30MPH - the whole thing is a conspiracy to make you forget that electric cars exist, that ethanol/biodiesel is a lot cheaper and easier to produce, that fuel-cells are more treehuggy and that Honda actually made a Civic that ran on water and made muffins in the glovebox, but the CIA covered it up.

Only the last one is made up.

The Dodge Nitro. How to feel:

How to feel about it?

I've seen the Nitro a bunch of times at car shows. On one hand, it can be customized and - on rims, with tints, a blackout grille, and TVs in the headrests - this thing will be alright. But so will anything. Aside from that, do Volvo-driving soccer moms really need another family truckster with 4x4? Let's be honest with ourselves. If you're serious about your 4x4ing, you won't be going for this Dodge. That'd be like taking your cousin to the big dance - deep down, you'll know you can't really do anything serious.

And so, briefly, don't spend 20K on this. And, whatever you do, don't spend close to 30 for the leathered out, 4x4 (link to 'price announced Autoblog story). Basic Transportation suggests something basic - like the Jeep Unlimited.

Holy Crap! Basic Transportation spawns off-shoot, Cool Cheap Cars blog.

Brain bogglingly, Basic Transportation has spawned itself an offspring. The Cool Cheap Cars post on bt got such a massive response (I think my dad read it and told a buddy), that it's now led to a brand new blog.

Prepare yourself for - the a much better looking that this - Cool Cheap Cars at coolcheapcars.blogspot.com will be devoted to cars, SUVs and trucks that people can actually afford. Anyone can sound smart when telling you about how fast the new Ferrari is. Who cares? Are you a banker? Has the stock market been good to you? I didn't think so.

Cool Cheap Cars will keep you on the cutting edge of cheapness AND coolness. Still under development, Cool Cheap Cars aims to become not only the number one car and truck blog but also the most-visited, best loved and cheapest website on the world wide web (or 'web' as the cool kids call it.)

The Electric Car We All Want.

- New-School technology, oLd sKool flAva.

There's just nothing quite like cruising yo six fo. Today, you can put Lambo doors on your Chrysler 300 - rim it up, drop in some amps - and you've got a pretty cool car, one that looks right in front of the club. If you trying to roll extra hard, you might spring for some airbags, remote-controlled ones - so you can drop it like it's hot as you walk away. Doing all this to the current breed of electric cars, what few there are, just wouldn't work.

However, there's West Coast tech-hippies (think Burning Man) that have been converting ordinary, pimpable cars to electric for years (some, decades). The article you can see by clicking on the title is from L.A. Weekly about an L.A. comedian who's had a '48 Oldsmobile, like the one pictured, converted to an all-electric, lowrider. Though the juice box takes up most of the backseat, it's a small price to pay for an electric car that can actually do burnouts - and, presumably, other stuff regular cars can do - like not making you look like a lamer to the ladies. You've just witnessed the future of sustainable motoring. Remember where you were at this moment.

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Smart monster truck. No, I mean, really, Smart.

Most folks in America haven't encountered the Smart ForTwo. Part of Daimler (Benz), Smart's been making the FourTwo since 2000 and it's surprisingly comfortable and you can park perpendicular to the curb and, of course, it gets fantastic gas mileage.

We'll get a chance to check out the practical little car thing when it comes to the States next year. In the meantime, however, superfreaks at the Smart offices (or whatever) in Greece decided to spend what little time they may have on taking the 84hp, six-cylinder, diesel engine and transmission from a Unimog uber truck and shoving it up skirt of the tiny ForTwo. The result is pure Greek comedy - minus all the insest. To give credit where it's clearly due - Greek 4x4 Rally Champion/God Stefanos Attart was the one who designed the thing.

This bad boy you find your eye drawn to is the ForFun - something that will never get built but exists as a bit of a publicity exercise - and there's nothing wrong with that. The ForFun couldn't fit the Unimog's unbelievable suspension - but it does feature individually-adjustable shock absorbers.

Check out http://www.thesmart.ca to see a couple more pictures - they've been kind not to sue me for using the above image.

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Is this really the future of Chevrolet Cars? Really?

No...Really? Ford is all over the news. This isn't a Ford. And it's hard to say it's a Chevy. Chevy just makes Trucks and SUVs anyway, right? A Chevrolet motorcar, in fact, all cars made by General Motors used to be proud, bold machines. A Bel Air didn't give a shit if you didn't like fins. A Le Mans wiped its ass with safety. Novas didn't come with cupholders.

The problem with this turd isn't that it's small or that it's slow. Many fine automobiles are. But, is it a Suzuki? Is it an Isuzu? Daewoo? Hyundai? Kia? You see where I'm getting at. Putting a bowtie on this is like putting a slice of pickle on monkey's brain floating in beet juice - it don't make it American, it don't make it a Whopper. This ain't no Chevy. Now, according to Autoblog - and the release they copied and, then, painstakingly pasted - this sad thing isn't set to come to the States.

Meanwhile, my pappy's paying a benjy ($100) a week to gas-up his Tahoe. We're open to small, even slow cars. This Country made the Beatle what is is today. Even the Pacer had a place in our hearts, and it blew up. These were compact cars that had personality, charisma, that Herbie factor. Small cars are alright, but it's sad if they make you look like you couldn't afford a bigger car. A small car should make you look like you're too cool for a Denali. What the hell is this thing?

Want to see a small car that a person with self-esteem might bejewel onto his European driveway? The original was just voted the sexiest car of all time, or something very similar, by Top Gear magazine. That's because, when gas is the equivalent of six dollars a gallon, as it one day will be in Brentwood, and is today in much of Europe - small cars are much more attractive. Whether your other car is a Ferrari or a Mercedes or a Yacht, you'll want to get to work in something that manoeuvres through traffic and goes easy on the bloody petrol, mate. Parking and going down old city streets feels stupid in a Durango. Behold, in the tradition of old cars making a comeback (still pissed off the Microbus isn't coming back), check out the Fiat 500 - reborn (in 404 days).

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Mel Gibson and his Cars.

Few stories this week have captured our imagination like Mel Gibson's. According to the police report / charging documents, he was driving a 2006 Lexus LS when pulled over by an L.A. County Sheriff on Pacific Coast Highway.

But, wait a minute, surely a dashing, accomplished actor such as Mel wouldn't be caught dead in a dentist car like that - even if he did have an open bottle of tequila riding shotgun, nothing rockstars-up a middle-of-the-range Lexus.

Mel's got a proud history of driving cool stuff in his flicks. The extended cab Chevy truck in Lethal Weapon - this was before big trucks were cool. Before that, let's not forget the mean-looking 1973 Australian XB GT Ford Falcon Coupe customized as the 'Interceptor' in Mad Max. He even revived the role for a very special episode of the Simpsons.

In Payback, he drives a Chevelle and an old, beat-up Cadillac limo - too cool.

Plus, in 'What Women Want'. I think he takes a cab. Anyone of these fine vehicles would have made a much better option for being super drunk in. Sprinkle a little style on the 'ol, drunken jew hate.

• Check out Jon Stewart tell it better on the Daily Show - Here.
• Steve Colbert (he was funnier on the Daily Show) gives his take - Here.
• Take your celebrity gossip kinda seriously, why are you here? You should be - Here.

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RVs for people who don't suck.

I like the idea of having a toilet and a couch wherever I go. It's not that I'm lazy, or fat, or a redneck. I just like to have the choice of being comfortable.

But RVs haven't really changed since the 70s and bring up a lot of feelings that I explored in my landmark, conversion van post. Check out Autoblog's feature on RV's that are pretty cool - plus, it includes the GM Futureliner, the awesome bus thing General Motors were using for something called Futurama - a touring show that showcased futuristic innovation throughout America.

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Forester Airbrake causes outbreak of throwng up.

'Wagon' didn't always mean 'disgusting' - but just look at this!

There was a time, when, if you were the kind of person that has lots of kids, more than 2 or 3, you'd have no choice but to get yourself a station (estate, for my UK friends) wagon. Today, only a rare breed gets themselves a wagon - and they're rarely cool-enough for surfers to buy after your kids move out.

This monster is the new Suburu Forester Airbrake, out in Japan. Suburus aren't even bad cars, though I've never heard of someone owning one, not even on MySpace.

Even the Benz and BMW wagons have an air of quiet desperation about them. Let's look at what a wagon once was, in another installment of Cool Cheap Cars:

Witness this gorgeous, 66 Plymouth Belvedere. A wagon from days when cars were named after presidents, not random crap (airbrake?).

Entertainment for the kids? Singing songs, maybe farting and blaming it on each other. However, this is something you could drive and not feel bad about spawning all them youngins. $10K

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Little? Yellow? Different.

Not all small cars have to be sad. The British International Motorshow reveals some gas-sippers that'll make you trade in your Silverado.

This year’s British International Motorshow was filled with all things little. Which beckons the question: with $3.30 for gas in L.A. right now, how long before something very, very small – if not necessarily yellow – is going to start sounding good? The answer is ‘never’. Truly little cars, like the Smart Fortwo, which is coming to the States next year, are never going to appeal as long as you’re still driving next to Excursions on the freeway. This thing can be parked sideways and has been around in Europe since 2000. It’s also a lot more comfortable than it looks.

But small cars aren’t just for large numbers of clowns. Some cars that go easy on sucking up the go juice without making you look like a loser immigrant were also shown off at limey carfest '06.

Let’s leave out the engine and suspension bits for the moment. These cars are faster than you’ll need and handle great, enough said. Look at them.

I’ve always made fun of Volvos. I’ve been known to point out that people that buy them are afraid of life. But the new Mini/GTI/Audi-killer is just so decent looking, It's hard to talk crap. The C30 is due out in September and, hopefully, you won't have to be an architect or a chiropractor to afford one. While most Volvos look like they were built to shelter you from the spooky world of motorized transportation, this one looks pretty good and comfortable. It’ll be starting out (in the UK, anyway – where I read the press release) with a ‘1.6-litre petrol, gov'na’ and going to a five cylinder with a turbo – at some point later.

The Alfa Romeo’s not coming to the States, but you can import one. C'mon, do it. It looks great and has a fast-enough 2.2L engine.(you can get bigger ones, but we’re trying to avoid that – remember?).

There's nothing that's small, that looks like this, that isn't a Spyker or something. You'd look past the comfort of a Tahoe to purchase one. Yes, it's an Alfa and will break - but why can't Chevy make something that even comes close?

Hybrid trucks are stupid, by the way.

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That'll Buff Right Out:

Rolls-Royce demands Insurance Details from Photographer

The curves, the engines, the luxury – no – what attracts the most attention at a supercar show is the sound of metal hitting metal. Especially when the metal on the receiving end costs – wait for it - € 4.5million. A park’n’sell for rich people in the hyper-exclusive Hurlingham Private Club, in south-west London was interrupted by a metallic thud as a photographer thwacked the Rolls Royce EX101 Concept with the metallic pole which held, ironically-enough, a velvet rope to protect the precious, almost-$10million Rolls.

The EX101 was created as a design exercise to showcase all that a Rolls could be. The coupe’s body is crafted out of carbon fiber and aluminum with lines that recall the super-coupes of yesteryear, the kind the movie stars used to drive. Its doors open backwards so that are “rear-hinged” (suicided), so that “The driver and passengers step in rather than fall in backwards, as demanded in a conventional two-door coupé.”

However, as a London photographer found out Rolls Royce doesn’t take kindly to people crossing their rope. A high-ranking German from Rolls’ BMW overlord quickly confronted the apologetic snapper to teach her a thing or two about respect.

Click here to listen to Basic Transportation’s exclusive recording of exactly how that went!

The file is crackly and distorted, but treat yourself to angry German man’s assertion that the car costs “four and a half million euros”. He questions the photographer why she climbed over the barrier. Between apologising, profusely, the photog (who you really can’t hear) explains that she just wanted to get a shot of the inside. “I didn’t want to hurt the car, I just wanted a picture.”

The recording ends, exquisitely, with the German Rolls Royce guy asking the lowly, freelance photographer if she has insurance.

Very sorry for not having a picture of the tiny, marble-size ding right next to the red RR on the side.

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National Corvette Museum’s Commission Impossible
-The Corvette’s not just an expensive, shiny Viagra bottle – it’s an icon. But can the museum start another American revolution and put some hard cash in its pocket?

I'm not even sure why Kentucky needs a Corvette Museum. I suppose people with kids need to have a place to take them on Saturdays. They can look at all the Corvettes and marvel at what GM was once able to do. Today, Corvette is very separate from Chevrolet.

Where once, teenagers with posters of 'Vettes on their wall could at least buy Corvette's ugly cousins from Chevy lots, today, there's nothing that really shares in the go-fast-for-cheap bloodline. Nobody's going to buy a Cobalt because they like the Corvette.

However, that didn't stop one member of the Corvette museum's inner-sanctum, a GM exec, no less, from offering the museum money if it could convince 100 non-GM drivers to switch to a Chevy, Pontiac, Buick, Hummer, Cadillac, GMC or Saab.

Of course, it would probably take more than the $25,000 the guy's offering the museum to actually figure out how GM could do this.

There's not a lot of appeal in these marks for those who haven't already bought into the GM fantasy. However, if you prize comfort you've already got a Chevy SUV GMC, H2 or Caddy.

But maybe, you just want a shiny new car with two sunroofs without the burdensome pressure and inconvenience of having a job - in which case you've probably already got a Pontiac adorning your parents' driveway.

Perhaps, watching Frasier while reading books about wine and listening to world music in a Starbucks are all highly appealing to you - in which case - you still won't be running out to buy a Saab because, of course, you've already got one - in yellow.

The point is, there hasn't been a new reason to buy any of the brands the museum needs to get their money. Rumours have it that the money, so desperately needed by the Corvette Museum would go to build a life-size papier-mâché replica of the Corvette. It would have a working, papier-mâché engine and be made entirely from Corvette drivers' divorce papers.

Ford's done a wise thing by creating a halo car for the Mustang. High school kids trying to keep up the grades to get a V6 Couple can look up to the GT 500. Just think about how hard you'd pound those index cards. study guides and see-and-says if you knew that just one 'D' and you get a Malibu instead.

Cool Cheap Cars
-Don’t make monthly payments like a jackass.

New cars are good. New trucks are good. However, for your latest automotive purchase to be even slightly cool, you’ll have to spend at least around $18,000 American, hard-earned squilla – plus tax, license, registration, full-coverage insurance, plus washing it!

That means that, instead of spending your money on something useful, like food, a home or cigarettes – you will be paying a car company hundreds of dollars every month just for the privilege of driving a fairly nice set of wheels.

Basic Transportation feels that this is bull plop. And so, with the help of my friends and yours at eBay, let’s look over some pre-owned­ vehicles that will still look good in front of the club and let you keep your money, while occasionally sharing it with a mechanic of your choice.

Lincoln’s latest sedan is the Zephyr, a Mazda 6 with a Ford Fusion on top of it, topped out with some nifty xenon bulbs and shiny plastic plus leather seats and many, many Lincoln emblems, so that you don’t get confused.

If you want Lincoln elegance, you’ll just have to go spend $30K. Or – don’t.

Instead, check out the gorgeous, restored Lincoln Continental from forty-five years ago. White and red, vinyl interior, suicide doors, big-block V8. There’s always plenty on eBay and always costing way cheaper than they look.

You’ll feel good driving it – which is something the Zephyr can’t deliver for twice the cash. The best part? If you ever manage to get tired of this beautiful Lincoln, just sell it for the same amount.

Luxury not your thing? You might be looking at a civic or the Fit (you, lamer) for some practical transportation. $20K isn’t too much to spend on a sensible daily driver, you say to yourself. But that’s money you can spend on hot-air ballooning around the world or a bathtub made out of gold. Why not spend one tenth of that on a late 70s/early 80s Granada. The car of cars – wow your friends with your retro flava.

There’s plenty of other cars that deliver the same roomy practicality and don’t really cost anything at all. Looks pro at the office and you can park it in the hood! For one notch higher, choose a sweet little 60s Plymouth Fury or Nova four-door. They can all be had for less than $10K, - the Granada goes for 2 and, unlike the sucker ides, they don’t loose all that once they’re yours. Check back for more cheap, eBay goodness, in future installments of ‘Cool Cars you Can Purchase (CCCP).